Secret caregiving handshake?

I'm starting to think that caregivers need a secret handshake, there are so many of us.

Today became a really hard day. Dad's nurse called to tell us that he was headed out to a doctor's appointment that I knew nothing about, so I headed out to meet him at the doctor's office.

This doctor hadn't seen him since last spring, so he had no idea about the cancer, and was certainly not expecting such an impaired patient. The waiting room wasn't laid out well to accommodate his wheelchair and his nurses weren't really prepared to help him get in and out of the chair. When we finally got him situated on the examination table, I was at the end of my rope and found myself crying in the hallway outside of his exam room. One of the other nurses said "you must be the caregiver" and took me into a conference room, gave me some water and let me explain the entire story to the doctor in private.

I think I was most bothered by the indignity Dad was suffering. He needed strangers to help him in the bathroom and he nearly fell. He was exhausted from getting in and out of the chair and up and down off of the table. He couldn't clearly explain how he felt or what he wanted, and I just felt awful for him.

Once he was done, we loaded him back up and he went back to the nursing home and I headed out for some time to myself. I'm still tearing up really easily and just feel like going to bed and having today be over with.