Relentless

I've not yet managed to post about the week of the 9th. Maybe I'll get to it later. Dad has been in a nursing home since Friday. He's got some breathing trouble and can't manage all the stairs at home. Between the hospital and the nursing home, he's been away from home for 10 days now, and I've been running point at home, with Mom and with Dad and his medical professionals.

My parents are relentless. I imagine my friends with children must sometimes feel the same way about their children. We've been to the hospital or nursing home every day, some days for 9-10 hours. Mom had had doctors appointments, we've been trying to get legal stuff set up, and Mom's been trying to pull stuff together for taxes. I'm pulled 16 directions at once, and I don't seem to be making anyone happy.

Mom has dementia of unknown cause and she's been diabetic (type one) for over 50 years. Her memory is beyond poor, and she can be stubborn, rude and totally ungrateful. I'm tired of trying to anticipate everything and getting yelled at for it. Diabetics that have lived with it for over 50 years are a complete unknown to doctors - my Mom's generation is the first to have diabetics that have lived that long. Her blood sugars are unpredictable when she's stressed, no matter what she eats or does. Her doctors are really great with her, but her sugar drops to really dangerous levels with absolutely no warning and for no understandable reason. It's not bad enough to be trying to do all this stuff, but to have to stop dead and treat hypoglycemia damned near every day just pushes my patience to the edge.

My boyfriend came to visit and got me to leave for 24 hours. His family lives about 90 minutes away, so we took off Sunday afternoon and returned Monday afternoon. No big deal, right? Wrong. I had arranged with neighbors to keep an eye on Mom and that they would come and check on her if needed. I called her around 9 pm to check on her, and it went to voice mail, so I figured she was talking to her family and kept calling. At 10:30 Dad called me, telling me that he hadn't been able to get through either. So I called the neighbors and they came over, finding that the phone was not hung up correctly. Whew. I made the 3:00 a.m. blood sugar check phone call and that was ok. Double whew. But on Monday morning, when Mom tried to go to the nursing home to see Dad, she got lost, despite having directions taped to the dashboard of the car. She was afraid to try to go home, so she stayed at the nursing home until I got back at 3 p.m.

So, I've learned that there are no days off and that I really can't just leave. I'm going to have to find some help around here, but my parents don't agree. Ugh.

There's battles to be fought with the insurance company over the price of chemo, and many other phone calls to be made. But I'm realizing that I've GOT to set a schedule with time for me to do things that make me feel like I'm not being picked to death by birds. I'll keep you posted.

Dr. U.